It’s awards time here at TBPOF. We’ve taken a slightly different look at the season just gone, and awarded those we thought most worthy. So without further ado:
▪︎PLAYER OF THE SEASON – ALEXIS SANCHEZ
A lot of us go about our day to day jobs trying to do as little as possible while still getting paid. Alexis Sanchez has taken that to a whole new level. £350,000 of the queens pounds every week and an extra £75,000 when he decides to try and play a bit. What a season it has been for that man’s bank account. Cha fucking ching. 💸💸💸
▪︎THE WE DON’T HAVE THE PLAYER’S IRISHMAN OF THE YEAR AWARD – MATT DOHERTY
How are we expected to compete with the likes of Georgia, when all we’ve got is the best bloody right back in England? 🇮🇪🇮🇪🇮🇪
▪︎THE TIM SHERWOOD NOT MANAGER OF THE YEAR AWARD – JULEN LOPETEGUI
Not many have the ability to destroy a team that has won 3 Champions league’s on the bounce, but Julen Lopetegui is no ordinary man. Sacked from two of the biggest jobs in world football in one year. Tremendous work ethic.
▪︎THE LASTS LONGER THAN YOU IN BED GOAL OF THE SEASON – SHANE LONG VERSUS WATFORD
With all the shite attached to modern football these day’s, you would sometimes forget the basic concept is to put the round thing in the net. Well Shane Long hasn’t forgotten, and it only took him 7 seconds.
▪︎ASSIST OF THE SEASON – JORDAN PICKFORD VERSUS LIVERPOOL
With the team he secretly supports in desperate need of all 3 points and time running out, the England number one took matters into his own hands and produced a lovely lay off via the crossbar for Divock Origi to head home.
▪︎TRANSFER OF THE SEASON – DECLAN RICE ( IRELAND TO ENGLAND )
I was going to name him young Irish player of the year as well for the craic but …. oh wait …. ara for fucks sake. ☹😐😐
▪︎HE’S NOT THAT TYPE OF PLAYER TACKLE OF THE SEASON – TYRONE MINGS ON NELSON OLIVEIRA
▪︎PUNCH OF THE YEAR – THAT FELLA WHO WALLOPED JACK GREALISH
Birmingham fan’s seem like a lovely bunch altogether don’t they.
▪︎THE GRAEME SOUNESS TACTICS MY ARSE GAME OF THE SEASON – MAN CITY 4 TOTTENHAM 3 (CHAMPIONS LEAGUE)
A tactical battle for the ages we were told to expect. Instead we got two teams who nearly scored with every shot and that looked like they hadn’t a clue what they were supposed to be doing.
▪︎SUBSTITUTION OF THE SEASON – KEPA ARRIZABALAGA v MAN CITY
Kepa was also in the running for manager of the year if they had won that final. He had an angry willy to deal with in the dressing room at full time after refusing to go off with minutes remaining in the whatever the fuck their calling it now Milk/Coca Cola/Carling cup final.
▪︎EXCUSE OF THE YEAR – JURGEN KLOPP AND HIS WIND PROBLEM
Blamed the wind on more than one occasion instead of fessing up and telling everyone what they already knew – Adam lallana is useless and probably Harry Kewell in disguise.An excuse Alan Pardew would be proud of.
▪︎THE VINCENT JANSSEN I FORGOT HE EXISTED AWARD – ANDY CARROLL
He scored that overhead kick last season to remind everyone he was still alive, but I genuinely forgot he existed for most of the season. Is Jack wilshere still a thing as well?
▪︎QUOTE OF THE YEAR – MICK MCCARTHY
“The ones that hounded me out, I hope they enjoy their sexy football in League one ” Never change Mick.
▪︎THE SEPP BLATTER AWARD FOR TRANSPARENCY – JOHN DELANEY
The money was just resting in my account x 1000. God I’d love to see him go to jail. 🤠🤠🤠
▪︎HOT TAKE OF THE SEASON – TBPOF AJAX VERSUS TOTTENHAM
“If Ajax play their cards right here they could win this by four or five”. They didn’t😐😐😐
Any other suggestions for Alternate awards? Don’t forget to like, share, follow.